For the first time I feel time like a heartbeat, the seconds pumping
in my breast like a reckoning; the numinous mysteries that once seemed
so distant and unreal threatening clarity in the presence of a truth entertained
not in youth, but only in its passage. I feel these words as if their meaning
were weight being lifted from me, knowing that you will read them and share
my burden as I have come to trust no other. That you should know my heart,
look into it, finding there the memory and experience that belong to you,
that are you, is a comfort to me now as I feel the tethers loose and the
prospects darken for the continuance of a journey that began not so long
ago, and which began again with a faith shaken and strengthened by your
convictions. If not for which I might never have been so strong now as
I cross to face you and look at you incomplete, hoping that you will forgive
me for not making the journey with you.